Posts tonen met het label body. Alle posts tonen
Posts tonen met het label body. Alle posts tonen

zaterdag 4 november 2023

Day 408 - Laurence Dervaux EXPO in Charleroi

Today I was fortunate to be able to see an exhibition in Charleroi from the Belgian artist Laurence Dervaux. The works in the exhibition were centered around the theme of the ‘liquids’ within the human body (such as blood, water, etc.) and the ‘fragility’ of the human body as a system that depends on these liquids.

When I entered the first room I immediately had to think of the book ‘Dune’ in which the scarcity of water, and how to frantically keep and recycle it, is such a central theme. But that was not so much the intention of the artist, as the entire installation functioned more as a metaphor for the entire human body through which liquids travel and are contained.

One of the smaller pieces, which looked like a network of blood vessels in the shape of baby-lungs, came with text, saying that the combined length of all the blood vessels in a human body, measures more than twice the circumference of the earth...  Now that made me ponder… because this means that the human body is indeed a vast system, a small universe of its own. The same reasoning can be applied to any body, to any animal or creature.

That alone should make us have so much respect for ourselves and each other who inhabit this world, as physical bodies. The realisation that we are each a vast universe of it’s own, yet extremely vulnerable, because we actually need each other to be able to live and co-exist. Real divinity would be to live in a manner that honours this realisation: where our actions are rooted within respect and consideration for ourselves and each other.

Yet, in this world not even the most vulnerable among us, seem worthy of our consideration. We declare wars, knowing full well that children will be the victims of these atrocities, and we declare them anyway. Does humanity deserve a seat amongst the Gods in the heavens? Or did we invent hell because we know we did nothing to stop the hell on this earth?

It is important to realise that there exists a way to 'stop'. Atrocities happen because at some point, we 'give in' to our emotions, we give in to our anger and our fears. This is an internal 'movement', an inner 'tipping point'. This inner movement does not happen without our 'consent'. We consent to it because we are participating in it. It takes many years to train oneself into developing the diligence and self-discipline required to be able to stop such automated forms of participation in emotions. I recommend to learn about self-forgiveness and how it works - because that is how you are going to learn to develop inner silence and the ability to Breathe through your own emotions when they visit you. 

zaterdag 21 september 2019

Day 370 - Buying New Pants

After I had gained 10 kilo's in the course of the year, I started to worry about my weight. This 'problem' became also a practical problem because I could no longer fit my pants. I desperately started to do sports such as biking and running, but my weight remained pretty stable. I would go to work with a button of my pants open and long shirts so that no one would notice that I cannot close my pants anymore.

At this point I realised that I was abusing myself and my body and that I had to buy new pants, simply because I actually had the means to do so. Therefore I bought a set of new pants that would fit me comfortably and with which I could go to work. Within buying those pants, I also accepted that this is now my weight and I stopped being 'in conflict' with it.

After a few months another point opened up where I realised that I had developed a habit of overeating in the mornings. So, this is now a point that I am re-adjusting. It seems to me that this type of realisations and insight can only open up after I have made the step to embrace my body first, because as long as I am in fear I am also in denial of myself and my reality.

Another good blog that inspired me with perspective on this point is: https://parentingforlife.net/my-new-body/

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For more information about writing, self-forgiveness and applying self-change, visit: http://desteni.org

For the Free online self-forgiveness course, visit: http://lite.desteniiprocess.com

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dinsdag 31 juli 2018

Day 352 - Standing up from self-inferiority

Today I would like to speak about a moment where I faced great difficulty, yet where I was able to stand up within the challenge. I did this by using the tools I had learned at Desteni, by asserting myself with breathing and grounding myself physically.

Early on in my professional career I was faced with corporate hierarchies and I had to report to the managers above me. My job was salesman and I had to deliver numbers. At a certain point in time, I got a new manager and I had to learn to deal with him as a person. Due to the organisation in the company I had previously very much been left alone to deliver my results in the way that I saw fit. When the new manager was appointed, I started to experience increased levels of anxiety, as he was pressuring me to improve my output.

In general I would listen to him and value his feedback, but I also noticed that he would place expectations on me that I was seeing I would not realistically be able to fulfill. This was causing stress in me and actually creating an experience where I started to dislike my job.

Then, one day, we had a ‘quick meeting‘, standing face to face in a meetingroom. We were talking about the numbers and he brought up this point of me having to sell 20 contracts in the coming month. I knew that in the past I was able to sell 15 contracts at best, and on average I would sell 10 contracts. In that moment I was very clear that 20 contracts would not be realistic to commit to. So when he brought up the point of the 20 contracts, looking me intensely in the eyes, I focussed on remaining calm and I said in a very calm and allmost nonchalant way: Ok, I’ll do my best.

I could see that he was not happy with my answer and he leaned forward and said: „What ?!!“

At this point I became very anxious. At the same time I realised that I could not show my anxiety and that I had to take responsibility for this situation. I could feel how within my body I was trembling with fear as I was moving myself to speak. While I spoke I made sure that on the outside I remained calm and collected. Here I applied breathing and using my body to ground myself. I said to him that there were circumstances to take into consideration why the 20 contracts may not happen (in a nutshell). A few seconds later in the conversation the tension completely relaxed itself and we were having a comfortable conversation.  

This is how I was able to prove to myself that through changing the relationship with myself, I could change my relationships with others.

For more information on self-forgiveness, breathing and self-change, visit desteni and EQAFE

dinsdag 30 mei 2017

Day 338 - Guilt over extending Sick leave

Today I am writing on an experience of ‘guilt’ I was dealing with in regards to being physically ill for a few days.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel guilty for wanting to prolong my sick leave, because what if my employer thinks that I am not really sick.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to consider compromising myself just so that I would make a good impression at my work.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not place myself and my body first.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear getting fired if I am sick too long.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have fully respected and honored my body and the process it requires to heal.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to have made ‘the rights of my employer’ more than the requirements of my body as an equal expression of life.

I commit myself to walk self-care and consideration in regards to my body as myself.

I commit myself to care for my body as my responsibility towards myself and towards life.

Eventually I did go back to the doctor and in hindsight this was a great gift to myself to have given myself extra time to recover and become really well before going back to work. This was a really cool practical application of placing self first.

*Find out more: http://desteni.org
*Free online course to learn self-writing: http://lite.desteniiprocess.com